She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 130)

Place for Instruction

This display of small miracles favoring fervent participation in the Holy Eucharist must have had a telling effect in the setting of an ancient Christian village where Holy Communion had been, since time immemorial, something too serious to be received frequently. And much less, every day!(2) Here the Blessed Sacrament was treated more with reverence than love; and the inhabitants, although believing and religious, ordinarily maintained a respectful distance toward It. The people still remained in Domine, non sum dignus—Lord I am not worthy.
The people had to be brought, even if through miracles, toward a greater living of the great Sacrament of our faith. The Word of the Lord has been insisting on this since the beginning: Amen, amen I tell you, that if you do not eat the flesh of the Son of man, and drink His blood, you will not have life in you. (John 6:53) And besides this, we Christian should not neglect another great reason for reception of the Eucharist mentioned by St. Paul (1 Corinthians 11:28), Every time that you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the immolation of the Lord, until He returns.
Until he returns. The Eucharistic promotion coming forth through Garabandal has another extremely important purpose: the imminence of difficult times, the eschatological days when, less than ever, can the faithful remain alone in the face of peril . . .

Characteristics of the
Eucharistic Proclamation

We can do no more than list them.

* Concerning the location of the extraordinary Communions, we can state that the places where they most frequently—but not exclusively—were received by the girls were: at the Pines, before the doors of the church, next to St. Michael's Stone in the Campuca.(3)
* Concerning the time, it was as if the Angel were scrupulously complying with the regulations then existing in the Catholic Church (at that time evening Communion was considered an exception); the morning hours were almost always mentioned by the girls.(4)
* Concerning the ritual, we have seen that Conchita tells us in her diary, and Fr. Valentín in his notes, that it followed the usual form: praying the I confess, the reception of the sacred Host, thanksgiving, and the prayer Anima Christi (Soul of Christ).
There is one fact worth noting. It was observed during these Communions that the Angel always acted as an accessory performer; that is, he acted as an extraordinary minister, to make up for the absence of a priest who could ordinarily give Communion. This absence was very frequent in Garabandal since the pastor lived in Cossío, and it was there that he celebrated Mass most of the time. Although he went up to San Sebastián on almost all the afternoons after the phenomena began, at the time—as has already been indicated—it was not the
normal custom to distribute Communion during the evening hours. And sometimes it happened that even though there was a Mass in the village, the girls could not assist at it since they had to go work in the fields. Nor did the many visiting priests provide a solution to the difficulty, since they almost always arrived past noon.
From the manner in which the angel acted, it becomes clear once again that—according to the designs of God—there is no reason to expect a miraculous intervention to obtain something that we ourselves can procure the ordinary means at our disposal.
Many examples could be mentioned here to illustrate what has just been said, but the following one should suffice.
Fr. José Ramón García de la Riva, states in his Memorias:

«I was able to prove that the Angel didn’t give Communion to the girls if the parish priest, or another priest with faculties, was present and exercising this ministry in Garabandal. This I noticed as a result of a study that I completed and things that I repeatedly observed. It can be used as an answer to those who ask the question: How is it possible that an Angel acts in a ministry that isn’t his own?»
In continuing on, Fr. de la Riva explains a very interesting proof, which will not be put down here, but will be put down later, since it merits being reported completely and with special care.
The daughter of Ramón Pifarré, who ran a pharmacy in Barcelona and was one of the best witnesses of the many happenings at Garabandal, related to me how they had witnessed one of Conchita’s mystical Communions in June of 1962.
The girl’s ecstasy was much the same as usual in these cases. However the spectator’s attention was sharply attracted on seeing the girl, some minutes after receiving Communion, but still in ecstasy, laugh . . .
It was necessary to ask her what happened, and the girl explained:
—Before leaving, the Angel said to me, You see, I came early today, so that you don’t say that I kept you hungry. (At that time the Eucharistic fast was still long and rigid.)
Mrs. Asunción Pifarré told me that it was a little after eight in the morning, and the girl’s mother Aniceta had collected the sheep that were to go up the mountain with Conchita, since that day she had to be a ‘shepherdess’.
«I recall that sometime later Fr. Valentín came to Maximina González’ home where we were staying. He came from Cossío, and asked for Conchita. I told him that she had left. And he was irritated, saying that he didn’t understand this, how an Angel could come to give Communion, knowing that he was going to come and that he could very well give It himself. But I think that the Angel’s attitude in coming early couldn’t have been more thoughtful, looking out for the welfare of the girl who was awaiting a long burdensome day.»

_______________

Aniceta, Conchita’s mother, who can tell us so many interesting things, has a good recollection of something that she experienced personally.
It occurred during the summer season when she had much work to do in the fields . . . In the morning she set out with Conchita, prepared for a long day’s labor; but before going to the place of work , they went up to the Pines, since Conchita had been advised to go there to receive Communion from the Angel. Withdrawn and silent, they waited in that unforgettable site. Time passed and the Angel did not come. The mother, always in a hurry, began to get impatient. She was not used to spending time without doing anything . . . And then she began to get upset, since there was so much that had to be done! Finally, she said to Conchita, Well, let’s go. I think that we’ve waited long enough. We are wasting time and today we have a lot of work to do.
The girl implored: Wait a little longer, mama! The Angel always does what he says. I don’t know why he is late today . . .
The mother agreed reluctantly. And while waiting she glanced down toward the village, and with the excellent vision of a country woman, she clearly distinguished the shape of a frail Franciscan knocking at the door of her home. She turned quickly to her daughter, saying: This explains everything. We are not going to waste any more time here. Look down below. You have someone to give you Communion. That’s the reason the Angel isn’t coming!
They went down in a hurry, approached the priest, and accompanied him to the church, where they received Communion from his hands.(5)

* * *

On several occasions these Communions through the ministry of the Angel were means of important lessons for the girls.
Jacinta will never forget the lesson she received early in the apparitions . . .
One day she, Loli, and Conchita were called to the same location. The three knelt down in a row in front of the Angel; Jacinta was in the middle.
And everything began as usual: some introductory words from the Angel concerning what they were going to do, the “I confess" by the girls, This is the Lamb of God . . . Lord I am not worthy.

The Angel gave Communion to the first girl in the row in the usual way. In the meantime, Jacinta, next in line, raised her head, opened her mouth and held out her tongue in preparation to receive. But the Angel—not in the usual way, but as if she were not there—passed by her with the Body of Our Lord to the third girl . . .
Noticing this, the little girl’s eyes opened wide and tears began to stream from them. Everything within her asked a distressed Why? Why? She did not understand why the Angel had refused her Communion like this.
The explanation (and the lesson) came immediately. Did she not remember the argument that she had had with her mother? What had the Virgin told them so many times? She had to do more to conquer that fault, that lack of submission, that way of speaking . . . She could not receive the Lord in such a state.
Jacinta, weeping, recognized her fault. How could she do otherwise? She had to resign herself to the punishment of remaining without the Eucharist, so painful under those circumstances.
When she returned home, her mother knew immediately that something had happened to the girl. She had come back so different from the other times!

—What happened to you?

—The Angel didn’t want to give me Communion. (and tears filled her eyes again)

—And why is that?

—Because of an argument that I had with you, one that I can’t remember.
The mother could not remember either; but things do not pass by so easily before God. Sins do not disappear by a simple forgetting, but by a sincere repentance of the past—strictly necessary for mortal sin—by the sacrament of Penance.(6)
—The Angel —Jacinta said— won’t give me Communion again until I confess.
Good lesson! We can be sure that her fault did not enter into the category of mortal sin; and consequently, there was no strict necessity for confession. But Communion requires very much, especially in persons highly favored with gifts of grace; these cannot abandon themselves to carelessness, to an attitude of being good more or less; from them is demanded an amendment and a serious effort to be better.

In the light of this episode, which the visionary will never forget, it is not difficult to understand how God looks on certain attitudes or doctrines that today are gaining vogue among so many here on earth. There is no relationship between sacramental Confession and the Eucharist . . . One can receive Communion without going to Confession. This makes sense only in the very rare case of the worst sins, but in ordinary life . . . The necessity of innocence in order to receive Communion must not be exaggerated . . . and in any case, the general absolution, which is given at times in the liturgy, is all that is necessary; anything else is an excess. It can be observed that from the moment in which the Mass is looked upon predominately as an assembly of the people of God, and Communion as a symbolic meal among brothers, the necessity for such interior purification will not be recognized.
In this point as in so many others, Garabandal comes to the Church in preview, mercifully and salutarily offering beforehand admonitions from heaven for deviations on earth. Is this not the main reason that it has encountered great hostility?
Garabandal, in its eminent Eucharistic dimension, mysteriously foreshadowed the actual state of Catholicism today. It holds out with striking force the eternal doctrine of our Mysterium Fidei, a doctrine which is being attacked by a dangerous crisis, a doctrine whose defense required new documents from the Supreme Magisterium, to culminate in the Credo of the People of God that Paul VI proclaimed to the world on June 29th, 1968:
We believe that just as the bread and wine consecrated by the Lord at the Last Supper were changed into His Body and His Blood, which was to be offered for us on the cross; likewise the bread and wine consecrated by the priest are changed into the body and blood of Christ enthroned gloriously in heaven. And we believe that the mysterious presence of the Lord— under what continues to appear to our senses to be the same as before— is a true, real, and substantial presence.

The unique and indivisible existence of the Lord glorious in heaven is not multiplied, but is rendered present in the sacrament in the many places on earth where Mass is celebrated. And this existence remains present —after the sacrifice— in the Blessed Sacrament in the tabernacle, the living heart of all our churches.
And it is our very sweet duty to honor and adore in the blessed Host which our eyes see, the Incarnate Word Whom they cannot see, and Who, without leaving heaven, is made present before us.
I have chosen these high points of our history — the threshold of the second year of the events — to speak of the Eucharistic dimension of Garabandal. Although this dimension was manifested openly during 1961, it came to the forefront above all in 1962 to such a degree as to give the second year a special characteristic, one that for centuries has been described in the ancient axiom of the early Christians:

to Jesus
through Mary

2. The case of Garabandal in this regard is not unusual. I have known many other small towns in sections of León and Castille where the frame of mind was about the same. I could name a little village in Burgos that had the most devout practices, where no one missed Sunday Mass or the rosary that followed it, where at specified hours of the day there was prayer in all the houses, where there was never heard a blasphemy. Nevertheless, its inhabitants, as the most natural thing in the world, received Communion only once a year to fulfill the Easter Duty.
3. Fr. De la Riva, the pastor of Barro, seems to indicate in his Memorias that there was a period in which the Angel gave Communion solely to Conchita and Loli. He wrote:
«Conchita received Communion at the Pines, at the Cuadro, near the courtyard of the church; Loli, in the same places, but not at the Pines (at least to my knowledge).
I watched and took photographs of several Communions of this type with Loli, and one with Conchita when she was against the door of the church.
These ecstasies with Communion ordinarily didn’t last more than ten minutes.»

4. And sometimes at extremely early hours corresponding to the early morning prayers of the ancient monks. The report that I heard from Loli’s mother Julia is worth noting. One night the girl had an apparition in her home when her parents were in bed but not asleep. After a while the girl got up, went to the door, and began to descend the stairs . . .
It was about three in the morning. It was hard for her mother to get up because she was tired and sleepy, but she could not leave her daughter alone. She got out of bed, got dressed, and went outside after her.

In ecstasy Loli went to the church and in the courtyard fell on her knees to receive the Communion that the Angel came to give her.
It had snowed and it was very cold. Julia confessed that on seeing her alone at such an hour of the night, surrounded in complete silence by the dull splendor of the snow, alone at the side of her little girl, that she was out of this world! She felt a strange mixture of emotion and fear.
5. This seems to have taken place on the morning of June 20th, 1962, since among Dr. Ortiz’ papers I found a brief note written on June 19th by Eloísa, his sister-in-law:
«On the following morning we accompanied Conchita to the Pines where she waited to receive Communion from the Angel. We prayed while we were waiting . . . A long time dragged by. Her mother went to the side of the hill at the time, and saw a person who appeared to be a priest in front of her home. He seems to be wearing white cords, she said.
On hearing this, Conchita hurried down, and we followed her.

Actually it was a Franciscan priest, Fr. Féliz Larazábal, now deceased. He was then superior of a Franciscan house in San Pantaleón in Aras (Santander). We went to the church; he celebrated Mass and gave us Communion. Aniceta commented, That is the reason we have waited so long. Whenever there’s a priest in the village to give Communion, she doesn’t receive it from the Angel.»
6. This was confirmed for me recently by Jacinta’s father, Simón. He noted that on another occasion he had personally observed as an eyewitness of the Mystical Communions of the three girls—Jacinta, Loli, and Conchita—that the Angel left one of them without Communion. This could be seen by the girl’s gestures and actions and it was a punishment for some fault that she had committed.

She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 129)

“Communion from the Angel”

This is the first time that he gives dates for this type of Communion. So we can gather from this that it was on July 11th, Tuesday, that the girls first received Communion from the Angel's hands.
And perhaps this updated paragraph in Fr. Valentín's notes refers to July 11th:
«Conchita and Mari Cruz went at 8 o'clock to receive Communion, and they said that he did it the same as I give Communion (understood, of course, outside of Mass). The other two, Loli and Jacinta, went about noon and received Communion at the Campuca, higher than at other times (Probably meaning higher than the usual place of apparitions). And afterwards the Angel showed them where the Virgin was, and the Virgin beckoned them with her hand.»
Father Valentín does not tell us where the Communions of Conchita and Mari Cruz took place; but if this refers to the first reception from the Angel's hands, consulting Conchita's diary, we would have to conclude that their first Communion took place at the Pines. The reception of the other two girls occurred at the Campuca, a small meadow at the end of the calleja, below the Pines, which today has the little chapel of St. Michael located on its right. As a point of interest here stood what was called the Stone of St. Michael, because he appeared over this stone when giving Communion to the girls.
Here is a more recent and exact confirmation of this. In the previously mentioned conversation of the painter Isabel de Daganzo with Conchita at the college of Burgos during November of 1967, this remarkable description is found:
Isabel: I would like to paint an ecstasy of Mari Cruz, since I like her so much.

Conchita: Yes, I like her very much too. Mari Cruz is very good. Look. Mari Cruz and I received the first Communion from the Angel at the Pines at 5 in the morning. At six on that morning, Loli and Jacinta received Communion close to where the chapel of St. Michael is now— where the Angel's stone is.
We see that Fr. Valentín and Conchita do not agree on the time. Why this discrepancy? Perhaps it was due to the pastor who had to write down so many things on the run. Or perhaps it refers to Communions received on different days.

The circumstances of this first Mystical Communion at Garabandal are enticing, taking place at the beginning of a long and sunlit day in July, in the freshness of morning as things began to take shape in the emerging dawn light, accompanied by the singing of birds, the heralds of the sun.

There high toward the sky,
beyond the troubles and cares of men,
in the marvelous landscape of the Pines,
are three angels and two girls.

St. Michael brings the Lord . . .
The girls' guardian angels adore Him . . .
Prostrate on their knees, the girls receive Him.
This is the mystery of our faith!

O Sacrum Convivium.

When Conchita and Mari Cruz returned from their world of miracles, they could look out over a splendid panorama that would make them feel the truth of the Credo. I believe in one God, Father Almighty, Creator of heaven and earth, of what is seen (spread out now before our eyes!) and of what is unseen (how many proofs have we received of its existence!) and in one Lord, Jesus Christ, (in whom the two worlds meet joining them eternally in glory).
From Fr. Valentín's notes of July, 1961 can be seen the accuracy of Conchita's tense remark in her diary: And he gave us Communion for a long time.
Why then, if this began so early and had such importance, did the girl write it down so late, after having spoken of so many other things?
Perhaps this was due to the young writer trying to explain first of all what appeared most interesting, what she liked the most, and what was striking for the people: the appearance of the Angel and the Marian Epiphany, with their incredible series of exceptional phenomena.
Regardless, it cannot be doubted that this series of Holy Communions through the Angel's ministry, although it did not occupy the earliest position in the narration, is an integral part of the mystery of Garabandal.

She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 128)

“He told us to make our thanksgiving to God.”


CHAPTER FOUR

LORD WHERE
DWELLEST THOU?

In the first chapter of St. John’s gospel, there is an interesting episode.
Again the next day John stood with two of his disciples. And seeing Jesus walking, he said: "Behold the Lamb of God." And the two disciples heard him speak, and the followed Jesus. And Jesus turning and seeing them following Him, said to them: "What are you seeking?" They said to Him: "Lord, where dwellest Thou?" He said to them: "Come and see." They came and saw where He dwelled, and they stayed with Him. (John 1:35-39)

As John the Baptist did in his time, Mary also, during her time at Garabandal, was attracting the attention of her disciples to direct it later to . . . to Whom?
During the events of Garabandal, a resplendent Marian Epiphany manifested itself. But soon it became clear that this in itself was not the whole reason for Mary's coming; there was a higher purpose to come forth later.
The minds of the pupils tutored in the school of Mary, Jesus' first disciple, naturally were lead to an understanding and meeting with her Son. Garabandal can only be comprehended by realizing the significance of the axiom:

To Jesus through Mary

From this, the title of Part Two of this work.

Above all, to Jesus as He is present for us here and now in the Blessed Sacrament.

English: Adoration of the Blessed Sacrament, the Eucharist, the Body of Christ. The Eucharist is held in a modern monstrance, flanked by candles. We gaze over the shoulders of altar servers who are kneeling in adoration. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

* * *

It is highly significant that the girls, as the first apparition ended, ran to shelter themselves against the walls of the church, and later prayed within it a Station to Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.
Following this, there was hardly an ecstasy that was not related to the ineffable presence of Our Lord in the Eucharist.(1)
And along the same line, the first public message on the night of October 18th brought this out in a simple but very important statement:
It is necessary to visit the Blessed Sacrament.

But the Eucharist is not only the real presence of Christ in the Blessed Sacrament. It is also the Bread of Life, and its primary reason is to be the nourishment and nutriment of souls.
I am the Living Bread, coming down from heaven. Whoever eats of this Bread, will live forever. And the Bread that I give is My Flesh, laid down for the life of the world. (John 6:51)
From the start Garabandal began turning the attention of the visionaries and the spectators toward Holy Communion . . . For it is in this reception of the Eucharist that a great personal encounter with Christ takes place.

From the Angel's Hand

From the beginning of the apparitions, the Angel St. Michael gave us unconsecrated hosts.
We had eaten at the time, and he gave them to us all the same.
This was to teach us to receive Communion.It was like this for many days.
Evidently there was careful preparation—even in outward details—for something that deserved to be well done. (This preparation could be repeated today, even among the old faithful, for how deficient has become the way of receiving Communion. How careless! How irreverent!) Conchita's reference to eating refers to the Eucharistic fast, which in the days of the apparitions was still three hours.

One day he told us that we were to come on the next morning to the Pines —without eating anything—and that there should be a young girl with us.
And we brought the girl.And we did as he told us.The instructions having been completed, something serious and important was to begin, something having great exigency for the spiritual progress of the girls (and not only for them). For some mysterious reason, on this day, as on other important times at Garabandal, the presence of a small child-witness was required. Two six year old girls were always chosen for this function: Sari, the sister of Loli, and Carmen, the sister of Jacinta; we do not know which of the two was present on this occasion.
When we came to the Pines, the Angel appeared to us with a golden chalice.
And he told us, I am going to give you Communion, but today these are consecrated Sacred Hosts.
Say the "I Confess" . . .
And we prayed it, and afterwards he gave us Communion.
And after receiving Communion, he told us to make our thanksgiving to God . . .
And after making our thanksgiving, he told us to pray with him the "Soul of Christ." And we prayed it.And he said to us: I will give you Communion tomorrow too. And he left.

So Communion was given according to the traditional ritual of the Catholic Church. The first time that the pastor Father Valentín took down in his notes this type of Communion by the girls, he wrote:
«They say that he does it the same as I do when I give Communion.»

The rite started with an act of purification of the soul through the humble confession of sins; and ended by receiving the Lord within, with the making of an effort at concentration so as to communicate with Him.
This is what has always been sought with the thanksgiving after Communion; but unfortunately, for many of the new hour of the Church, priests and faithful alike, that is not the way it is today.

The Mass ends; the blessing is received. No reason to stay longer . . . It is finished. That's enough . . . It can be understood: It is not agreeable to remain before eyes that search out everything, to answer to a Presence that . . . Better not to think of that! Oh! The holy motive for rushing out and the great talk of caring for one's neighbor!
The Angel wanted the girls to learn to pray a brief prayer as an ending for their Communions. This particular short and fervent prayer has been used in devout areas of Catholicism since the days of St. Ignatius of Loyola. It can be found in many prayer-books (a rare species of printing that is becoming extinct).

When we told this to the people (receiving Communion from the Angel's hands) some did not believe it — especially the priests, since they said that an Angel couldn't consecrate.
And when we saw the Angel again, we told him what the people had said.
And he told us that he had taken Them (the hosts) from the tabernacles, that he had taken Them from the earth, already consecrated.
And afterwards we told this to the people.
And some doubted.
And he gave us Communion for a long time.

Conchita writes this down at the end of the first year of apparitions. And it is surprising that she does not mention it in the earlier pages, since the phenomena of these Communions—to which the term mystical was given to distinguish them from ordinary Communions—began very early.
From the beginning, she tells us; and in the scrambled notes of Father Valentín we find this brief notation, pertaining to the month of July, 1961:
«They said that they received Communion on the 11th, 12th, and 13th.»

1. A lawyer from Palencia, Luis Navas, went up to Garabandal several times and closely observed everything there. He wrote down in one of his notebooks:
«I asked the girls why they went to the church so often, since it was closed (they were not allowed to enter it in ecstasy), and they answered candidly: Because the Virgin likes to go near the place where her Son Jesus is.»

Instructive answer. Those doubts and ambiguities — heretical or semi-heretical — about the real presence of Christ in the Host reserved after Mass in the tabernacle, doubts which have infiltrated deeply into the mentality of some Catholics in spite of all the explicit teachings of the Supreme Magisterium, are not acceptable to God.

She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 127)

“It was not a game of ours.”

April 19

— What the Virgin told you about pride and humility . . . did you receive that together with the message?
— No. She said it on another occasion: What God loves most is humility; what most displeases Him is pride.
— Would you like to see the Virgin again?

— It's all the same to me. I hope to see her in heaven.

— Why do you talk that way?

— It would be painful for me now because of my denials . . .
April 21

They discussed the article in La Gaceta Ilustrada:

— It was not — Conchita remarked — a game of ours, nor did we do it to deceive. Nor did the pastor talk to us about guardian angels on that day. He almost never gave us catechism. Nor did we get together in order to make up the message . . . Nor did I prepare any dough to make the host for the Communion . . .
It's true that we did many stupid things too, that Cardinal Ottaviani read to me in Rome (10) from a report by the bishop of Santander. For example, the thing about the powders, the statue of the Virgin that we were going to hide, and some other things . . .
April 30

To inspire her, the Sister talked to Conchita about how much Our Lord and the Virgin loved her.
— Yes. But They love everyone. When we were talking to the Virgin about things that were too personal, she didn't answer us; she was concerned about others.
May 4

Conchita had decided to celebrate this month of the Virgin better than ever. On this day she met with the Sister and told her:
— If the Virgin would present herself to me now, how many things I would ask her! At the time, we only said stupid things to her, things without importance. I think that we did it to make her stay longer so that she wouldn't leave us, for at times she remained silent and didn't look at us.
— Do you think about the mysteries when you pray the rosary?
— No. I give my attention to what I'm saying in prayer.
When I hear the Virgin talked about, whatever is said good or bad, I think is said to me, since I consider her something mine.
The Virgin is very much with us; she isn't distant . . .
One day she gave me a statement to tell a certain priest; I gave it to him and he wept very much.
(Here the Sister added that the husband of one of her former students had recounted how Conchita had spoken personally to him in Garabandal about
something very hidden in his conscience, and that this had made him resolve to change his way of life.)
May 8

By a telephone call from Francisco Sánchez-Ventura the Sister had received news that the Bishop of Santander had just been killed in a tragic accident; the Sister told it to Conchita, who was overcome and later broke out in tears.
— I am so sorry about what has happened! He was very good and very young. The poor man! He did everything with good intentions. Isn't that true? This warns us that we must be prepared. So many things can happen to us in this life! . . . Now
the Bishop knows everything.
June 11

The apparitions were discussed. Sister asked:

— Why did you fall on the ground?

— We were not aware of that; we were with the Virgin! And we followed the conversation or communication with her, without knowing if we were running or not, if we were on our knees or lying on the ground.
The Sister makes a note here: A few days previously Father Laffineur had come and asked me how Conchita looked to me. I answered: “Simple, natural, candid, intelligent. So normal and well-balanced that I could certify that in my profession as a teacher I haven't known another like her." I also told him that I didn't find a very strong will in her.
June 14

— The Virgin didn't tell me that she didn't want me to leave the village and be in school.
June 17

— Our greatest treasure is within. The external appearance doesn't matter much; it should be made agreeable, but without affectation.
— I understand, and I see that you are right. We told the Virgin that we wanted to be beautiful like her . . . But she smiled and was silent. If she had conceded it to us to have her face! How the people would have looked at us! She is so beautiful!
— At times you did strange things in front of her.

— Yes, we walked sitting down for example. In the beginning I was very surprised in seeing this in the others; afterwards I became accustomed to it. I saw them descend a steep stairway this way.
I recall once having a knee injury. The doctor ordered rest, but I didn't take care of the knee. And it didn't hurt after that. Without taking a treatment, I had a complete cure.
They said that on another occasion I had left blood on a stone; but later I didn't notice anything on my knees, except a little scratch.
— In some of those things, did you add something of your own invention?
— Yes.

— Doesn't it seem to you that some of your little deceits, on top of seeing your present doubts, could contribute in some way to cloud the truth?
— It is very possible that could be. Don't think that I haven't thought about it.

* * *

Conchita passed the summer in her village, with the exception of the last half of August when she was back again at school. In October she returned to Burgos to begin the 1967-1968 school year.
October 18

— Have you noticed what day it is today? We should do something more in prayer. Shall we stay in prayer this night? . . . What happened on this day in 1961?
— We announced the first message. We had already seen it beneath the Angel; but we didn't understand what it meant. The Virgin explained it to us . . .
On December 22nd, Aniceta came to Burgos to pick up her daughter. She had not come to take her back only for the Christmas vacation; she was taking her back permanently. There had been strong exterior influences and pressures that caused this.
On one of the last visits Conchita told the Sister:

— From time to time I see more clearly that what happened to the four of us girls was true, but we wasted it . . . Our denials are our own doing. Sometimes, although very briefly, I see this very clearly.
And the Sister closed the long chapter of her remembrances of the extraordinary closeness to the child of the Montaña with these lines:
I give thanks to the Most Holy Virgin for everything. Whether she has appeared or not at Garabandal, I have been moved in everything by their love, and certainly all this has brought me to love her more and to feel closer to her.
May this be the final result for everyone, while we continue to revolve between the light and the shadows of . . .

THE GREAT MYSTERY OF
GARABANDAL

10. When she was called there in December, 1966.

She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 126)

“a girl with many faults”

December 2

The first Thursday of the month — a priestly Thursday. During the interview, the Sister read to Conchita some edifying letters from priests.
— Before the Virgin told me about it, I thought that all priests were good. It had never occurred to me that they could commit mortal sins too.
I have known many . . . Some appeared holy to me in the beginning; later I saw things that I didn't like. I learned later how people can be deceived. At first I was very friendly to all, but on noticing that my trust was badly interpreted, I changed.

- - -

Sometimes I wonder if there's anyone among the persons that I know who really loves me. Many compliments, many endearing phrases, but they want me for themselves. I saw that even the priests got angry with each other in order to have a bigger part or involvement with me . . . I'm ashamed that they praise me, and I'm pleased that they tell me what I do wrong.
December 3

The Sister read and explained the parable of the Good Shepherd. On this occasion, Conchita was confiding the memories of her life from early youth, with peace and joy . . . She ended this way:
— Everything that happened I see now as if in a dream — the apparitions, the people . . . I'm sorry that many doubt the apparitions because of my denials. It occurs to me that, although I denied, I would still like to say, Have hope! Don't be discouraged. I think that the three other girls feel the same.
When I think about the Virgin, I picture her as something I dreamed. How nice it would be if now she would come here in this parlor with the two of us! What a joy! It isn't necessary to be perfect to see her. I have been a girl with many faults. On the day on which the Angel appeared to us, I had just fought with Jacinta. And I see that today I still don't like to pray. She comes to make us good . . .
If you could see how human the Virgin is! Sometimes she comically repeated our badly spoken expressions, and she did this in order that we might have confidence. But we had it from the first moment.
Now I have doubts about many things; but what I don't feel the least doubt about are the calls. I remember them perfectly, and moreover, as if I were feeling them right now.
December 6

— We have not always been treated well. Sometimes they said outrageous things about us, and they insulted us. How many times I had to listen to outright lies about us!
— When they acted this way, did it bother you?

— No, I remained quite calm. Actually I was not hurt; and it was this way with the four of us. I don't know the cause. That they say nasty things to me doesn't matter to me; it humiliates you much more when they flatter you.
I don't feel rancor or hate toward anyone. When the priests of the Commission or those in charge of us attacked us, and the others became angry because of this, I did not. I thought that they had to act like this; and I loved them. I love very much the people who seem good, pious; and also I love those who are sick, and those who live their vocation or, having a vocation, are not able to attain it. Perhaps, after the Miracle, I also will be able to become a nun. What a pleasure that would be!(8)
January 27, 1967

Because of certain rumors, the Sister asked Conchita about her diary:

— Did you write the diary about the apparitions on your own or did they tell you to do it?
— A priest told me that the Bishop said I should write it.
— You never speak of your conversations with the Virgin.
— What for? We said such stupidities . . . Nevertheless, she never reprimanded us for it; she listened. One day we asked her something serious: What we should do to practice penance. She answered us, Always do what your conscience tells you. She didn't say anything else. I seem to remember also that once she told Loli to obey her mother.
January 31

Certain persons had brought water from somewhere or other, and also some relics for Conchita. When the Sister in doing her job was giving them to her, saying that a visionary had brought them, Conchita told her . . .
— It seems that you don't believe anything about this. I don't have much faith in seers either, without denying that some are true.
— For me not to believe much in these things is logical, but for you that . . .
— That is something very different! I don't know how to explain it; but it's not the same.
— They said that this visionary sent a message to your mother, saying harsh things, and that you threw it away. Why? . . .
— She said that my mother was acting very bad toward me . . . The Virgin didn't say that!
— She is more kind, is that right?

— Oh yes! She would never say that.

March 2

— Whenever we prayed the Gloria, the Virgin bowed her head.
— Did she rest standing on top of the Pines?

— We didn't see the Pines or anything else. We only saw her.

April 10

Many things had occurred during the previous weeks, for example, the «Nota» of Bishop Puchol, dated March 17th. This had greatly affected the Sister; and to a lesser degree, Conchita, who was able to notice the effect of the «Nota» in the village, where she spent her Holy Week vacation.(9)
That April 10th an issue of La Gaceta Ilustrada had fallen into her hands, publishing a pitiless article by the reporter Julio Poo San Román of Santander, speaking out against the events and visionaries of Garabandal.
— How did this article affect you?

— It's very bad. There are many lies in it. For example, it says that I didn't want the Bishop to inform the people about my denials, and the truth is that I myself asked them to make it known so that I would be more at peace with myself that way. What makes me suffer is that the people now look on us in a bad way . . .
I have only one desire: That the date of the Miracle come — not for the Miracle itself, but in order to see once and for all if it is true or not. If it has been the Virgin, the Miracle will take place, because what she says is always fulfilled. As for myself, regardless of whether the Miracle takes place or doesn't take place, it will always be bad for me.

— Why is that?

— If the thing is true — for having acted badly, denying and not being generous. And if it isn't true . . . well for everything!
If what happened to us, being good little girls, hasn't been supernatural, and God has permitted it to happen with the consequences that can result, then I couldn't believe that God is good. And my mother and brothers could never believe it.
The Sister advanced some explanations in order to clear up a problem and Conchita replied:
— I don't know the first two cases that you mentioned, since we didn't begin with a lie, and I can assure you that we made no agreement among ourselves.
— And what followed?

— It was the same as at the beginning. It isn't true that we rehearsed this! How could they think and say that?
— Then I see clearly that these things did not come from you girls.
— I don't know how they came. I see everything darkly. What is clear to me is that we didn't plan them.

8. Conchita spent the Christmas holiday in the village with her family.
9. This «Nota» given to all news media by the Bishop of Santander, Vicente Puchol, intended to obliterate as false everything about Garabandal.

She Went in Haste to the Mountain (Page 125)

“The Virgin taught us to pray.”

November 9

The Sister tried to lift up her spirits, telling her that when the darkness passed she would enter into the fullness of God . . .
— What a joy if it were like that! But could I possibly experience more joy than I have experienced in the past? The apparitions of the Virgin filled me with happiness. But the locutions of Jesus are much better. I don't understand . . . It is something superior . . . I pray that He accomplishes His will in me.
The Virgin taught us to pray the litany and the mysteries of the rosary that we didn't know. She only prayed the Gloria; if she began with the other prayers, it was in order to instruct us.
The last time that I saw her was on November 13th of the past year at the Pines. She told me that I wouldn't see her there again . . . (She understandably made a long pause of silence and sentiment.)
Some time ago while in my village, the Virgin pointed out a Redemptorist father, a close friend of Mercedes Salisachs, for me to confess to him. This priest advised me not to dress so well, that he didn't like to see me so well-dressed. I didn't feel inclined to tell him my affairs; it didn't come out of me. I told this to the Virgin, and she was silent; she left me without a response. One day I made up my mind and told this priest what had happened. This made him very happy; but I was never able to communicate anything to him,; it was impossible for me.
November 12

Conchita seemed to need a day of rest, especially spiritually, to restore peace in her mind, agitated by a thousand confusions and doubts. The Sister understood, and responded to this need. At an early hour the two went out walking down the road leading toward the famous Monastery of Miraflores, taking lunch and a couple harmonicas. On the way Conchita spoke of memories that she held inside and needed to share . . . For example:
— You know Father Collin? Now he is trying to pass for the Pope.(5) He was in my village. He wanted to speak with me; but my mother would not allow it. The people finally threw him out of the village.
Well, when I was in Rome, they showed me a picture from a newspaper in which I was shown at Father Collin's side. And it mentioned there that he had been with me . . . And many other lies. I deny this, since I have never been with him. They make up many things like this.
One day a woman came to my village, and insistently asked me to inscribe a card for her. I wrote nothing more than, Ask that God bless our only Pope, His Holiness Paul VI. I don't know why that occurred to me. A little later a priest I knew well came running up and said to me, What have you written for that woman? She is a mason, a supporter of Father Collin.
The way was delightful — writes the sister — it was a little cold, but bearable. We stopped for a while on top of a little hill overlooking the city and I taught her to play the harmonica. She learned almost the complete Noche de Paz and the Ave Maria of Lourdes. Then going on in silence, we prayed a rosary under the sky. After this we entered the monastery, and sitting down there, we talked about a painting . . . At six at night people came to pick us up in a car. The afternoon had
passed devoutly and swiftly, in a wonderful peace.
At night we returned, and the two of us got together in the chapel while everyone was resting. She was in the chapel there at the beginning of November 13th on which she was going to have the first anniversary of the last apparition of the Virgin.
We began by meditating on the rosary. The chapel was dark; only the statue of the Virgin was lit up. The silence was complete and the presence of God was felt, during each mystery we paused, and I expressed thoughts that came forth spontaneously. I've never prayed in my life with more fervor! We were on our knees in the same pew . . .
After reposing a while in silence, seated in the first pew, we began our litany of petitions. With quiet around us, we spoke our requests for one person or another in a hushed voice. The moment was tense, with an extraordinary peace; we seemed to be a single person praying simply and with immense confidence. She began the petition, and I completed it, or vice versa. She prayed for a whole multitude of people and intentions, her glance fixed on the statue of the Virgin . . . Conchita began to say in a whisper:
— My mother and my brother suffer. Chon(6) has told me this and I see it from the letters that I receive . . . I don't know why it is that on returning from the monastery, I am finding such sorrow . . . This morning I didn't have the desire either to pray or think during Mass. My head was bowed low; I don't know if I accomplished anything. If this dryness would leave me, that would make me very happy. Do you think that thinking this is opposed to the will of God?
— No, Christ also said, “Take this chalice from me." You still have doubts, don't you?

— Just as before. That is, the same as before August 15th.(7) I see all the apparitions as if they had been a dream that has gone away.

— Can you deny them completely?

— No. No, that I could not! I would feel remorse. When I deny, I feel inside — deep down — something that doesn't leave me at peace.

__________

In a long series of petitions, there were these two:

María Nieves: We petition you, Lord, for the Pope.

Conchita: And for all those who surround him.

María Nieves: We petition you, Lord, for priests.

Conchita: So that they may be holy, and may not stop wearing the cloth out of presumption. I do not like to see a priest as a layman. Not at all.

The unplanned vigil ended near the altar — as Sister María Nieves wrote — like two children in front of the Mother of Heaven and God the Father. Something that I couldn't forget, for the simplicity, the peace, the interior joy. It was one o'clock when we retired, and it had seemed a very short time to us. On getting up from the floor, Conchita said to me:
— I would like to stay all night.

November 15

— In my village, they told me several times to kiss my mother when I had displeased her. I couldn't do this and it irritated me. I don't like to kiss. When they embraced me, I held out my cheek, but I didn't kiss; I really only kissed Loli.

November 16

— Sometimes they judged me bad without reason. I remember that one day the guards told me something bad that had been said about me. I let out a laugh, because I didn't understand. They became angry at my laughter. Later I mentioned it in my home, and everyone was upset. They even came to threaten the guards for having said such things to a child.
November 17

Conchita had heard that there was danger of war because of the situation in Gibraltar . . . She was worried, thinking of her brother Miguel, and she spoke to the Sister as soon as she saw her:
— How afraid I am of war! Will it happen?

In 1962, when they were talking about the threat of war, I mentioned it to the Virgin. Will there be a war?
She only answered me, God does not want war for His children.

That says a lot, doesn't it?

__________

In order to inspire Conchita to be strong in the face of difficulties, the sister talked to her about Christ. This obviously pleased Conchita; however, she ended up saying this:
— I think more of the Virgin. It is . . . as if I have more feeling for her. The Lord is very serious. And when He speaks to me, He seems concerned for everyone. The Virgin, as if more for me . . . Anyway, in summing things up: who loves the Mother, also loves the Son. Isn't that so?
November 25

— I remember that my village made me suffer. I felt as if imprisoned in it. I acted by the command of others who constantly advised me, Go to Mass . . . Pray the rosary . . . Do this . . . Give up that . . . At times I thought I would be happy to be in a hermitage away from everyone, and to work there alone for God, and see what I was capable of doing without their forever telling me.

- - -

On the one hand I have no desire for the feast of the Immaculate Conception to come because it will hurt me that this day arrives and I won't have anything. (All these years since 1961, I have had an apparition or locution on it.) And on the other hand, I fear that something will be given to me — since later anxieties will come over me as to whether it was or was not.

- - -

Do you know something? You gave me one of the envelopes that they made for all the girls on the 21st, the feast of the Presentation of the Virgin. It was sealed, and I received it with a great desire to know what the Virgin wanted from me. Do you know what mine contained? What she had told us so many times: Fidelity in everyday life!
November 29

— I would like to have my brothers priests. I have known many . . . I remember a young priest of the Heart of Mary, to whom I wanted to give the crucifix to kiss, drew back, and weeping said, I am not worthy, I am not worthy . . . When I had finished seeing the Virgin, I went up to him and, apart from everyone, communicated to him what she had told me. He wants to take off the habit and leave the congregation. On hearing this, he began to cry again. I've never seen him since.

5. This man lives in France and has his cortege and small group of followers. He calls himself Clement XV.
6. Ascensión de Luis, the young Jewish girl mentioned in a previous chapter, who converted to Catholicism.

7. On August 15th, 1966, a type of darkness concerning the apparitions fell on Conchita's mind.